Health Anxiety.

I hold this topic near and dear to my heart because I have had Health Anxiety my entire life. I remember when I was in grade 7 feeling a little lump under my jaw and thinking “I’m dying.” I even phoned up my mom concerned on what it might be. It would consume my thinking for the entire day. This is Health Anxiety.

Last year I broke down thinking I had a STI. I was feeling a little pain when I was urinating and then one morning my mind literally thought I was peeing blood. I actually wasn’t, it was dark yellow, but my mind actually convinced myself it was red. I immediately broke down into a panic. I convinced myself that I had something wrong with me. It continued on even after my doctor told me I had no STI. I then began thinking it was cancer and one day, I went into the Emergency Room thinking it had to be an STD. This went on for weeks. I felt like I was dying on a daily basis. This is what Health Anxiety sufferers go though.

Now, if you are like my old self, unable to leave the house because of this debilitating anxiety, then you know how painful it can be. I was confused, running on no sleep, and completely overcome by this feeling of hopelessness. I was unable to walk one block from my house before shaking into a panic state and then running back home scared of the sensations.

To overcome Health Anxiety was the biggest challenge for me. The symptoms I was experiencing such as; lower back pain, discomfort while urination, lower stomach pains, headaches, and blurred vision, were all caused by ANXIETY. I never had what I thought I had. The reasons I had these symptoms was because of my Anxiety and the emotions I haven’t dealt with yet.

Now when I say emotions i haven’t dealt with yet, I mean our bodies store information that cause physical sensations. For example: When I think back on an embarrassing moment in my life that causes me grief, I will then feel that certain sensation somewhere on my body whether its my chest, lower back, head, and neck. Another common sensation is the lump in the throat feeling which a lot of Anxiety sufferers get as well. The sensation’s make us believe something is wrong and we constantly pay attention to the sensation for days. But if it doesn’t go away, it must be something serious right?

Wrong. I kept thinking about this pain in my right side for days and days but it wouldn’t disappear. I was giving it attention, thus, keeping the sensation alive. So how do you take your mind off of it and get over Health Anxiety?

Overcoming Health Anxiety:

1) Morning Journal – This is a MUST. Wake up in the morning and write down every negative thought and sensation you feel. What are you concerned about? Write it all down so that you get it out of your head, making it more easier to go about your day without all these bad thoughts bombarding you.

2) Wear An Elastic Band – On my right wrist, I wore an elastic band to help notice and replace those negative thoughts. When you think about that horrible thought, snap the band. When you focus in on your uncomfortable sensation, snap the band. When your mind wanders off from the present moment, snap the band. It took a long time to re-train my brain and for this technique to work for me but it is so important that you do it. Every time you snap it, your brain is associating that horrible thought with pain. So snap it 100 to 500 times a day, as many times as you need to, and get your mind back into the present moment.

3) Acceptance – This was something that completely changed the game. Those many nights when my sensations were through the roof, and I couldn’t sleep, I completely gave in. I stopped fighting the feelings. I let go and laid there thinking: “If it is going to kill me, then so be it.” I accepted the feelings and surrendered. Then guess what happened. I sunk into my bed feeling it all, no matter how uncomfortable, and they began to go away.  I started to feel more relaxed, and eventually went to bed. Anxiety is uncomfortable but not life threatening. So just give up fighting it.

4) Setbacks – Setbacks are inevitable. When you’re in recovery, it will be a long winding road. I would have 2 good days, then 1 bad day, then 3 good days, then 2 bad days and so on. The pressure of overcoming anxiety in one day to one month will only add more Anxiety. Just know that you are sculpting a new YOU and that takes time. It has been 6 months for me and I am still improving on myself daily. Enjoy the journey.

5) Breathing – It keeps you alive, yes, but anxiety sufferers have shallow breathing. When we get caught up in our thoughts, our breathing becomes extremely shallow. When you start paying more attention to you breathing throughout the day, you won’t get caught up in your mind too much and come back to the present moment. My favourite technique is the 3x3x6. Three seconds inhale, hold for three seconds, then exhale for six seconds. It got me to a more relaxed place as well as help my digestive system function much better. So set daily goals to pay attention to your breathing and you will find that this is the key to taming your anxiety.

6) Fuck You Old Self – Change is tough. When I was moulding my new self, it was painful. All my old habits that was causing me grief went down the drain. But when I was going through this change, my old self was doing everything in his power to come back. One day I would go back thinking in my old bad patterns, another I would dive back into an old habit that fueled my anger and anxiety. Some days I would kick myself for giving in but its all part of the process. Start doing things to better your new self. Quit bad friends, start reading instead of watching TV, and take up meditation to start getting in touch with the now.